Thursday News: Stop the presses!

For Marines in Afghanistan: be careful where you fart

“So here’s the news:  audible farting has been banned for some Marines downrange because it offends the Afghans.”

If I don’t get a comment from Doug on this, he must be dead.

Military Fart Ban Is a Real Stinker

Don’t we have a weapon already in the locker to cover this? I’m referring to the SBD (Silent But Deadly). Sheath Farts, Mark I.

Statistics du Jour

The
population of this country is 300 million.



160
million are retired.

That leaves 140 million to do the
work…

There are 85 million in school.

Which leaves 55 million to do the work.

Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal
government.

Leaving 20 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied
with killing TERRORISTS !!

Which leaves 17.2
million to do the work.

Take from that total the 15.8
million people who work for state and city
Governments. And that
leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given
time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.

Leaving
1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people
in prisons.

That leaves just two people to do the
work.

You and me.

And there
you are,

Sitting on your ass,

At your computer, reading jokes..

Nice. Real nice.

Massachusetts Governor Patrick rejects Secure Communities following a series of Rapes and Murders.

Nicolas Guaman is a illegal alien, Guaman has been arrested many times; for burglary, assault and many other offenses. Secure Communities program ensures that illegal aliens are deported after the first offense. But when Guaman was released from jail his information was not passed on to the Federal Immigration authorities. Because the Massachusetts Governor doesn’t think that would be fair. This week Guaman killed a young man in Milford, MA. He hit  Matthew Denice with his car and dragged the screaming man a quarter mile behind his car. Then, confronted by the police, he backed up over Matthew’s still living body, which probably is when he killed him.

Governor Deval Patrick (D) made the decision that cost Matthew Denice his life. The governor was just re-elected. Even though his poll numbers were low and he was not very popular his re-election was assured by Republican divisiveness, massive out-of-state campaign contributions, and a shell game where a life-long Democratic hack posed as a third party challenger saying whatever was necessary to suck independent votes from the Republican candidate. Also, every TV news station and most of the states newspapers were solidly on his team.

I  call him “Obama-lite”, he is a unqualified equal opportunity lightweight that has been completely controlled by the majority Democrats in the legislature. He has helped complete the ruination of this state. And I’m very afraid that his re-election campaign was the blueprint for Obama’s re-election next year.

 

About On the North River

Forty years toiled in the Tel-com industry, married for 36 years widowed at sixty-one. New girlfriend at sixty-five. Tea Party supporter. Today a follower of the God-Emperor Donald. Do like to kayak, cook, take photos, bike, watch old movies and read.
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2 Responses to Thursday News: Stop the presses!

  1. Pingback: Thursday morning links - Maggie's Farm

  2. Pingback: Friday News | On the North River

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